11 Remarkable Tricks to Calm Your Nerves Before Dating
Who isnโt at least a little nervous before a first date? We all know that feeling โ when your heart races, and your mind is full of questions: โWill I even be liked by this person?โ โWhat should I wear to make a good impression?โ โAnd why do I have a pimple right now?โ All these thoughts racing through our heads are completely human and normal as we prepare for a first date. Luckily, Iโve prepared some tricks on how to calm your nerves before dating, so donโt forget to save them.
Whether itโs your first date or youโve had a few, tension and butterflies in your stomach are almost always present. That quiet fear of rejection and that little panic that things might not go as planned creates a significant amount of pressure within us. We all want to make a good impression, to be seen in our best light, and to hope for a second meeting. This desire for a perfect beginning is actually the main culprit of this anxiety.
11 Tricks on How to Calm Your Nerves Before Dating
1. Think about what you fear the most
Really think about what scares you. Is it the fear of saying something weird or awkward? Or are you afraid that you might not make the right impression? Perhaps the thought of rejection haunts you, or the worry that the other person might not like you just as you are. You know, we all have these feelings, and sometimes it feels like weโre spinning in circles of our own thoughts.
But hereโs the secret โ once you recognize what truly scares you, you gain the power to question those thoughts. Have a rational conversation with yourself: โWhatโs the worst that can happen?โ Or: โIs it really possible that everything will unfold just as I imagine?โ By clarifying these fears, you begin to see that they are mostly just products of your imagination. Suddenly, you can start to relax. This is the first step to stepping into your date with more calmness and confidence.
2. Donโt โCancelโ the date!
We understand that redirecting your thoughts is easier said than done, but it can truly work wonders. If youโre one of those who gets so nervous before a first date that you end up canceling, it might be time to learn how to shift your focus. One of the best tactics to prepare for a date calmly is to engage in activities that distract you for at least a moment from worrying about how the date will go.
Before your date, for example, you could make a to-do list โ maybe take a walk with your dog, do a quick cleaning of your apartment, or listen to your favorite music. This way, you wonโt be constantly thinking about the meeting, allowing you to calm down. By doing so, your energy will relax, and when you finally step through the door, youโll be more focused on whatโs happening here and now, rather than on your fears.
3. Try to just be who you are
How many times have you thought before a date: โWhat if they donโt like me?โ Such thoughts are completely normal, and most of us experience them. But donโt let these worries undermine your confidence. By accepting that we are all just human, you do yourself a big favor. We can all be a little awkward on dates; we might say something strange or come off as a bit clumsy.
The best way to calm your nerves before dating is to remember that you donโt have to be perfect. Focus on simply being who you are. How can you do this? Before you head out, remind yourself: โEverything will be okay.โ This simple thought will help you stay calm on a first date because youโll accept that youโre good enough just as you are. This way, youโll arrive at your date more relaxed, knowing that the essence lies in authenticity.
4. Itโs just a date
Too often, we get tangled up in our expectations and create countless scenarios in our heads. We think about how the date will go, what the other person will say, and we paint a perfect ending in advance. In reality, one of the best ways to overcome first date nerves is to tell yourself: โItโs just a date.โ
A first date is an opportunity to get to know someone new, nothing more. Youโre not obligated to please or meet someone elseโs expectations. Your only โgoalโ is to enjoy yourself and try to connect with someone authentically. By allowing yourself this simple mindset, youโll quickly realize that it helps calm your nerves before dating and allows you to be more relaxed. The moment you stop feeling pressure, you can truly start having fun and enjoy getting to know someone new.
5. Use icebreakers
One of the best ways to feel more relaxed and confident on a first date is to take the initiative in the conversation. Use icebreakers! Icebreakers are those light questions or topics that help the conversation flow more smoothly and casually. This can really contribute to feeling confident on a first date.
Choose topics that are simple yet interesting โ ask what their favorite movie or book is, what excites them at the moment, or what brought them on this date. This way, you wonโt just reduce tension but also create a space where both of you can feel comfortable and relaxed.
6. Set realistic expectations
When preparing for a first date, itโs crucial to set realistic expectations. This will help reduce anxiety before the date and calm your nerves because you wonโt feel like everything has to be perfect. Try to avoid the pressure that the date has to be like a fairy tale โ reality is often more unpredictable, but thatโs what makes it interesting.
Accept the natural flow of the date and prioritize spontaneity. Donโt stress too much about finding immediate chemistry or feeling like everything has to be like in a romantic movie. Focus on getting to know the person in front of you, their unique qualities, and characteristics. This will allow you to keep an open mind and more relaxed as you immerse yourself in the moment, without expecting everything to be perfect.
7. Donโt be late
Being late for a first date can increase feelings of nervousness. To find an answer to the question of how to be relaxed on a date, take enough time to prepare. This way, you wonโt rush through your routine, and youโll have a chance to calmly focus on yourself.
Make a list of tasks you want to complete before the date and estimate how long each of them will take. Your list might look something like this: showering and grooming (30 minutes), choosing an outfit (15 minutes), a light snack (10 minutes), some moments for deep breathing (5 minutes). By doing this, youโll have enough time to calm down and relax, leaving for the date feeling more prepared and clear-minded.
8. Get ready with music
Music can be the perfect ally when preparing for a date. While youโre getting ready and choosing your outfit, play your favorite songs that help calm your thoughts. How to be relaxed on a date? Sometimes the answer lies in a simple melody that reminds you that life happens outside of your thoughts and that you can take the date more lightly.
Create a playlist full of songs that energize you and lift your mood. Not only will music help you reduce nerves, but youโll also arrive at the date with a positive attitude, ready to enjoy the moment.
9. Prepare a list of conversation topics
Everyone wants the first date to go smoothly and without awkward silences, so preparing for conversation is a great idea! Calm your nerves before dating and make sure youโre ready with some interesting topics to help overcome any tension.
Why not create a list of questions you want to ask your date? For example, you could ask about their favorite movies or travel experiences, or share a funny story. And you know whatโs even better? While conversing, you can say, โI wanted to make sure I didnโt forget the questions I have about you, so I wrote them down.โ This will show that youโre genuinely interested and that youโve put in the effort to make the date enjoyable.
With a little planning and creativity, you can reduce anxiety before the date and engage in pleasant conversation that connects you and creates a nice atmosphere.
10. Breathe deeply and relax
One of the simplest yet most effective techniques to calm your nerves before dating is simply breathing. Trust me, this is more important than it seems at first glance! When youโre nervous, your breathing often speeds up and becomes shallow, which only increases feelings of stress. So take a moment to focus on your breath.
Try calming yourself by inhaling through your nose for four seconds, holding your breath for four seconds, and then slowly exhaling through your mouth for six seconds. This simple technique will not only help you overcome first date nerves, but it will also refresh you and fill you with energy.
Being aware of your breathing can help you stay present in the moment and focus on the date, instead of worrying about what might happen.
11. Remember, youโre not alone
Your date is likely feeling tension and nerves too. So donโt feel like youโre alone in this. Remember, youโre part of this human experience; itโs normal to feel a bit anxious.
If you feel comfortable, share your feelings with the other person. By saying something like, โIโm a little nervous, but Iโm looking forward to getting to know you,โ you can ease the tension and create a relaxed atmosphere in the conversation. This simple step will help both of you connect on a more human level and maybe even laugh about the experience.
12. Consider alternative responses
No matter how relaxed you may be, sometimes questions arise during conversation that surprise you or are somewhat sensitive. These might include questions about past relationships, opinions on certain topics, or anything else that could make you feel awkward.
Thatโs why itโs a good idea to prepare in advance!
Think about alternative responses to questions that might make you uncomfortable. For example, instead of getting flustered when asked about your last relationship, you could respond, โIโd rather focus on whatโs in front of me and enjoy the moment,โ or โIโm not quite ready to answer that question right now.โ By doing this, you not only avoid an awkward moment but also demonstrate that you can handle situations with confidence.
Itโs important to take a moment to think and not react impulsively. When youโre prepared, youโll feel more confident and relaxed, which will help you in calming your nerves before dating.
I wish you a successful first date!